Mic 22 Friend of My Mom
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Venue: Winchester Music Tavern
Hosts: Bryan Sternick and David Horning
Show: One More Joke
Set Time: 1
I am older than a good percentage of these comics. Bringing it up lands somewhere between getting carded and being told I look great for my age.
I can't explain their behavior to them. But I can't unsee their reaction either.
Recently I had the perfect case study. I've written before about being unconsciously treated like a mom by some of the pack. Bryan Sternik offered a refinement: not the mom. A friend of his mom's. It's a subtle distinction. It is not a better one.
Bryan consistently greets me like a friend of his mom's he ran into at a strip club — genuinely excited, no real idea why, but warm and familiar. Delighted, disoriented, and committed to getting through it gracefully. And then the awkward thing happens. He fist bumps me or goes in for the hug but almost takes it back. He has called me buddy and lately girlfriend — like, what's up, girlfriend.
Bryan Sternik is one of the more active grassroots builders in the Cleveland scene — a performer who also creates rooms, audiences, and opportunities for other comics. He produces showcases through Henceforth Comedy, including the open mic One More Joke. He's the kind of comic who gets on stage and stacks chairs afterward. To be fair, that's most of the people running mics in Cleveland. There are no crews here.
Oh my god, I just sounded proud of him, like a mom or one of her friends.
He isn't alone. He is just the most consistent and obvious about it. I need to learn to defuse it, maneuver around it. I have spent my entire life making sure I was taken seriously. I demanded it. Turns out that finally worked. Now I'm working on the opposite problem.
I took it to One More Joke that night. Bryan did not disappoint.
The comedian before me talked about going without, and Bryan transitioned by saying: "Our next comedian doesn't strike me as someone who goes without. She might live in the suburbs. Ladies and gentlemen — Missy Hayes."
And as I hit the mic: "What up, girlfriend."
Ever notice that Bryan greets me like a friend of his mom's he ran into at a strip club?
I closed the bit with an awkward reenactment where Bryan cycles through Missy, ma'am, and Mrs. Hayes before making some odd comment about a memory of his bike in my driveway.
It landed.
With a few seconds left, I circled back to the jokes about kids and family. Since Bryan had already floated the kept-women angle, I pulled up the first joke I have ever done about my husband.
Mama makes her money.
My husband spent 23 years as a Catholic high school teacher. His contribution to the house was a good tan.
That’s my time.
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